Isn’t it fun, when life throws you a curve ball? Just when things seem to be sailing along nicely, then all of sudden, boom! and you are in unknown territory, flailing in a sea of doubt and despair.
Well, that happened to me about eight years ago, beginning with the death of my dear Mother, when I was seven months pregnant. Next came a diagnosis of Cancer in my 4-week-old daughter, which felt like minutes later, not weeks, and amplified by the fact that my go-to person, Mum, was not there to ...go to. Then the journey that followed was full of numbness and confusion. Learning on the fly, all about medical things I never thought I would ever need to know and finding meaning to words that used to be little more than concepts or throw away comments.
The biggest one? Faith, or the idea that faith will move mountains. All of sudden I found myself existing in a single-minded paradigm of living in faith. A deep understanding that despite what was in front of my eyes, which was my infant child, bloated with tubes going in and coming out all over, unconscious and unable to even cry for my assistance, I had to keep my mind firmly and singularly focused on her being healthy and us all looking back on the whole journey as little more than an event that we went through. I was lucky enough to have watched a movie only days prior to the day we got the diagnosis, which was called ‘I am’. The value of this was immeasurable in the ensuing days, weeks and months that followed, and I called upon what I had learnt from that many, many times. Time passed, as did the cancer. The ‘event’ was over.
However, the road back to normal never came in a traditional sense, instead the oft mentioned ‘new normal’ had begun. It took a few years to fully grasp what they (hospital staff) had meant with such a small statement, but as life went on, I began to realise it was all encompassing, changing the way I looked at the world, my understanding of give and take, what expectation versus reality was and what I was willing to put up with within my personal and spiritual space. My entire social group had a reshuffle, and I could be even more specific and say it disintegrated around me, mostly at my doing. I recently heard that ‘significant trauma compromises our ability to engage with others, by replacing patterns of connection with patterns of protection and I can honestly say there is truth in this statement.
So, from that recent history, there I was seven years on, after being told to go live a normal life again by our Oncologist and like the rest of the globe, having been thrown into the bizarre new world of lock down and social distancing, I thought ‘What better time to try and reassimilate...?’ Within my personal belief system of putting thoughts and intentions out to the universe, I started imaging myself coming back to life, re connecting with people on my new vibration and finding ways to make the best of what I already had in my skills tool box, so to speak. Next thing I knew I was in contact with the effervescent Monika, and the next exciting chapter had begun.
I got in touch with Monika in response to a job advert. I was intrigued and felt that it sat comfortably within my idea of using my latent skills, within a community setting, without the pressure of jumping straight into a highly demanding role. This has involved 2hrs a week for the last six weeks, joining a wonderful group of diverse and happy people, all in a similar boat of wanting to turn their natural skills into a productive enterprise. The sessions are called the Happy Hobby hour, and the focus of the last few weeks has been how to take the ideas floating around in our thoughts and materialise them into real world outcomes. One of the most beneficial things I found was in the brain dumping exercise, which gently forced my hand into putting things down on paper in an ordered and easily referenceable way. Making things that seemed out of reach or conversely, small or vague, now feel achievable and realistic. It was quantified too, which helped with prioritising the ideas, and giving a clear starting point, with a much more focused finishing point. The friendliness of the group, and the welcoming energy of Monika was a huge help, as it took away any fears or anxiety which can often be enough to convince ourselves not to begin a journey, let alone see it through.
In summery I began this adventure on a gut feeling, with a sense of curiosity, not knowing what I was getting into, and now I am embarking on the creation of a business idea that I hadn’t even considered just a few short weeks ago. One that uses collaboration with some awesome individuals, gives a positive spin to the heady events of eight years ago, and will be of benefit to others. I couldn’t have done it alone, because I had never had such a great way to collect my thoughts and direct them like I have thanks to doing Monika’s course. I highly recommend it to anyone with an idea that keeps nagging at the back or your mind, or even just a skill that they want to share with others. Truly a life changer.
Cheers
Molly Jones